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how not to look hideous

January 30, 2010

i had to repost this because my original one fucked up my blog and i don’t know how or why.

i love makeup;  i always have.  when i was going through my tough times, i forgot about everything that was fun in my life – including makeup.  because i was home most of the time, my fashion sense faded and my love for makeup all but disappeared.  the only thing that i put on my face was moisturizer so for the last 15mos, i looked like a sallow, haggard witch.  well, i still do most of the time but when i go out, i now take the time to make myself look decent.

i was going through my vanity and makeup box and realized that my makeup is old.  i forgot that makeup has a shelf-life and the stuff i have is over 2yrs old.  they don’t smell bad or have any mold growing on them but i think it’s time to throw them out because of possible eye/skin infections/weird stuff growing on your face or whatever.   i don’t use much makeup to begin with – just concealer and powder, blush and sometimes a very sheer lip gloss.  i prefer a natural look so i don’t bother with foundation, face powder or eye shadow.  i don’t bother ‘playing up my eyes’ or ‘accentuating my lips’ – that just takes too much time and i am very lazy.  if i really want to feel/look fancy, i’ll use eyeliner and maybe a heavier lip color but my main concern is not looking haggard or tired.  i’m no makeup artist by any means but i do know that in order to brighten your face, you need to apply some color – which my face is totally lacking – such as blush, lip gloss and dab concealer in places to hide blemishes or dark circles.  because i’m really lazy when it comes to getting ready for anything, it takes me about 10mins tops to put my face on.  my ‘going-out’ outfit usually consists of jeans and a top.  if i’m going anywhere else like someone’s house or running errands, it’s basically what i’m wearing now – bum clothes, bare face, hair all in disarray.

so here’s my basic makeup collection.  i have a lot more but i have to throw those out because they’re really old and when i mean really old, i mean 2004 old but i just can’t bear to throw out makeup.  i know it’s gross and i never use them anymore but i spent so much money on them and they’re so pretty that i just hang on to them.  i am however, after this post, going to toss everything that i haven’t used in 6mos.

Laura Mercier Secret Eye Brightener – i love this product!  i don’t know what the ‘secret’ is but who cares – it works. it comes in a handy, easy-to-use pen that you apply under your eyes over any dark circles you have.  it doesn’t conceal the cirlces but serves as a base to brighten the under eye area before applying concealer.  it’s moisturizing and contains reflective particles to reflect light away from the darkness under your eyes.  i think it costs somewhere around $50 (maybe a bit less but i can’t remember) and lasts a long time because you don’t need much.  if i use it every day, it will last me about 6mos.

Laura Mercier Secret Concealer – i have searched far and wide and have tried nearly every concealer on the market and this is the best one i’ve come across so far.  now i don’t know about you, but my dark circles aren’t a purple-ish/blue hue that you normally see  – they’re brownish; like i have a dirty sanchez underneath my eyes.  i hate them because i can never get rid of them.  it’s part hereditary, genetics, skin tone and the fact that i get very little sleep that makes me look like i’ve been raving all night.  it’s hard to look or feel pretty when you have a dirty sanchez on your face that you did not willingly ask for so i will pay ridiculous amounts of money to get a concealer that works.  this one isn’t too expensive and it’s moisturzing, doesn’t cake or flake and – if you apply it right – looks natural.  this concealer takes the dirty out of the sanchez.

Laura Mercier Translucent Powder – to set the concealer, i apply a small amount of this loose powder around my entire eye area.  it’s so silky and sheer and also contains light-reflecting particles to brighten the eye area.  it also helps if you put a little more on your brow bone to give your face a lift.  you don’t need much either and it doesn’t sit in fine lines or cakes up.  here’s a trick:  instead of using a puff which doesn’t give you as much control as a brush, make sure the container is tightly closed, turn the entire container upside down once and then open it and dab the brush on the top of the lid.  that gives you just the right amount of powder to set the concealer and voila!  dirty sanchez be gone!

i have never used any products by Smashbox until now.  similar to concealer, i do some serious research and shopping for just the right blush.  in my opinion, blush is like concealer and foundation – apply it wrong and everyone can tell.  when you’re wearing noticeable blush, you look like you stepped out of a time machine from the 80’s.  i have a hard time finding the right tone for my skin; maybe it’s my lack of expertise but i like a very subtle look so anything too vibrant makes me feel like Roxanne and that i need to Turn on the Red Light.  when i accidentally stumbled upon this product, i immediately fell in love.  my color preference is a ‘fresh from a run’ glow rather than a ‘me love you long time’ look.  this gel goes on smoothly and instantly gives you a subtle pinkish hue as if it’s underneath your skin.   it’s $34 at sephora and worth every cent.

upon my discovery of the o-glow blush, i saw the lip gloss and without even trying it on, bought it anyway.  if it can transform my cheeks and brighten my face, surely the lip gloss will do the same thing – i was right.  i think this is $25 at sephora but who cares – it works, it looks great and works with your lip color.  the only downfall:  you can’t really use it properly if you’re wearing lipstick underneath or it’ll look weird.  i’ve never tried it with lipstick but that’s what the sales person told me.

i usually wear this alone because i haven’t worn actual lipstick since my wedding in 2004 and this is enough color to make me look more like a human and less like a corpse.

sometimes when i feel like getting all gussied up and apply some eyeliner.  i used to use bobbi brown but i found that it smudged a lot so i switched to stila.  this is actually pretty good – you have seconds to smudge before it dries and the consistency is smooth.  i prefer using eyeliner pots instead of pencils/liquid pens because i have more control using a brush.

the only other thing i have in my makeup arsenal that i use on a regular basis is vaseline.   i am a lip balm addict and i’ve tried every lip balm out there – i am not joking.  blistex, rosebud salve, chapstick, carmex, khiels baby lipbalm, burts bees – you name it, i’ve tried it and the only one that actually works is plain ol’ vaseline.  i have even spent $65 on a lip balm by La Mer which promised baby-bottom smooth and supple lips through the healing powers of something they found in the ocean.  you would think that for $65 it should damn well work and i fully expected to wake up the next morning with a newborn’s cheeks in place of my lips however, there was no change.  i didn’t see any difference and while their face cream is incredible, their lip balm is not.  my lips did not feel like a baby’s bottom and i felt robbed.  i could not believe that they extorted $65 from me when i could have stuck with my $2 tube of vaseline from walmart.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Kerry Kelley permalink
    February 2, 2010 6:53 pm

    First-rate writing. You have brought in a recent fan. Please maintain the fabulous posts and I look forward to more of your newsworthy posts.

    • February 2, 2010 7:49 pm

      thanks Kerry! this was a nice surprise – i didn’t think many people read my blog but i’m glad to have entertained you 🙂


  1. how not to look like a wrinkled sack of shit « Mindless Drivel

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